21 Weeks (21w0d)

Oddly enough, I think I look smaller this week than last week! Must be the white shirt, because I'm definitely getting rounder.

Thoughts on Pregnancy, Part 1 (20w3d)

Things I've learned in the first half of my pregnancy:

--It's not as bad as I thought it would be. In fact, with very few exceptions, it's been pretty easy.
--Not every woman gets morning sickness.
--I never thought I could be as tired as I was that first trimester.
--Tums are my friend. So are naps.
--Ultrasounds never get old.
--Not being able to write is a side effect of pregnancy no one told me about.
--Feeling the baby kick for the first time is weird, incredible, strange and startling.
--Right now, feeling the baby kick is just awesome.
--I've never known insomnia like this.
--Maternity pants are both hideously ugly and amazingly comfortable.
--My mood can shift from, "Wow, this is going to be a great experience!" to "What the hell have I done?" in a matter of hours. Sometimes minutes.
--Sometimes I feel too old to be doing this. Most of the time, I feel a lot younger than I really am.
--It's nice to have friends who are pregnant at the same time.
--It's very nice to have an amazing, supportive, pampering husband.
--No two pregnancies, or baby bumps, are alike.
--Breast pumps are scary things, but the idea of breast feeding is kind of scary, too.
--In fact, a lot of things about this experience are kind of scary.
--I'm not afraid of labor and delivery.
--C-sections, episiotomies and epidurals scare the hell out of me.
--I really hope I can experience natural childbirth without drugs.
--In the end, all that matters is getting the baby into the world.
--I am not one of those pregnant women who coos over every baby she sees, pops into BabiesRUs every chance she gets and already has a name-- and coming home outfit-- picked out.
--I am not the typical pregnant woman, I don't think.
--I have fears that I will lose myself. I don't even really know what that means, but I'm afraid of it.
--I suspect the second half of this pregnancy will go even faster than the first half.
--I'm really, really happy I didn't miss out on this experience. (That one kind of surprises me.)

20 Week Ultrasound (20w1d)

The ultrasound went beautifully and everything looks perfect! Despite being late to the appointment (hmph), we didn't have to wait long to be seen. Baby was very active, which made it very easy for the ultrasound technician to take measurements. Because he was so cooperative ("photogenic," the tech said) we were in and out in less than thirty minutes.

It's funny that I could only feel about half of the actual movements he was making. I don't suppose that will be true much longer. I already feel like I'm so much bigger than I was a week ago, but baby is weighing in at a very healthy 13 ounces, so I'm not too concerned about looking like a beach ball this early. After all the data was plugged in, the computer gave us a due date of December 6, which is only three days off from my original December 9 due date.

The technician said all of the organs and the umbilical cord looked good. We could see the four chambers of his heart pumping normally, his developing brain and his long, straight spine. Oh, and we could also easily see his penis, but just in case there was any doubt he's a boy, the tech sent us home with two pictures of the equipment.

My fibroids seem to be staying out of the way of anything important and I'm still hoping for a vaginal delivery (drug free!). I have a few more months before I'll know if that will be possible.

Unfortunately, we didn't get a profile picture this time as baby seems to prefer the forward-facing position. But I still think this is a pretty terrific picture:


When turned right side up, I think he has Jay's jaw line:


I don't know when I will have another ultrasound, but I couldn't have asked for a better experience this time around. It's so nice-- and such a relief-- to be told everything looks perfect.

Twenty weeks down, twenty more to go!

20 Week Bump (20w0d)

Half-way there! I feel like I'm a lot bigger this week than I was last week. And I still have 20 more weeks to go. Oh my...

Sweet Moments (19w4d)

I can feel the baby moving daily now, stronger flutters and rolls at periodic intervals throughout the day. Tonight I was sitting on the bed writing on my laptop and he was just wiggling like crazy. It went on for so long, I was sure Jay would be able to feel it.

Of course, as soon as I stood up and gave baby some room he stopped flopping around. But I put Jay's hand on the spot anyway and after a couple of minutes the baby started moving again. Then... Jay felt it, too. The look on his face was priceless. It was probably similar to the look I had the first time I felt it.

It has become more reassuring to feel the baby move, but it's still a little strange and startling at times. Being able to share it with Jay makes it so much more real... and so much sweeter.

Oh, and we picked up the crib today. I think we're starting to feel like expectant parents-- and that in itself is a sweet feeling.

Week 19 (19w0d)

Almost half-way there...

Tales from the Crib (18w5d)

We bought the book Baby Bargains a month or so ago based on some recommendations I read. It's a comprehensive-- and overwhelming-- book about everything you need for a baby. It is an awesome book and very helpful when facing the even more overwhelming task of having to start buying those much needed things for baby. That is, if you remember to bring the book with you when you go shopping.

We went crib shopping on Saturday (which was preceded by paint shopping) and forgot the book. We picked out a lovely crib and I felt very good about our choice... until we got home. The Baby Bargains ranking for our choice was an F! Oh my! Bad parents.

So... back to the store we went on Sunday-- with book in hand, this time. Now we have this crib on order:


Baby Bargains gives it an A-. I feel much better now.

Boy Parts (18w4d)

I keep having this bizarre thought:

I'm growing a penis inside me.

I told you it was bizarre. But no more bizarre than the miracle that is creating life.

Frustrations (18w2d)

So, I've been going along quite swimmingly with this pregnancy until a couple of weeks ago. First there were headaches, then there this whooshing-pounding started in my ears any time I moved or sat up, then I saw my general practitioner on June 26 and she was concerned about my blood pressure because it was 134/88. She made a bunch of adjustments to my meds (asthma and allergies) and recommended I see my obstetrician sooner than my already scheduled appointment.

So,I went to my obstetrician last Monday (June 29) and my blood pressure was completely normal (121/79). He was concerned about the headaches and has me taking my blood pressure 3 times a day to find out if there is a connection. There isn't. My blood pressure isn't higher when I have a headache and the numbers are all over the place from one reading to the next. Frustration.

Until we work out this problem with the headaches and blood pressure , my ob doesn't want me traveling. Which meant canceling the RWA conference (which I was waffling over for a variety of reasons already) and postponing (again) a trip to Chicago to see Sheri. More frustration.

I go back to my ob on July 20th. I had hoped to have a solution to this problem by the time I saw him. The good news is that the headaches and the blood pounding in my ears has mostly subsided. I'm still getting the occasional headache, but it's not the horrible debilitating pain it was a couple of weeks ago.

The bad news is that my blood pressure is still all over the place. My big fear is that it will be an ongoing problem and I'll end up on bed rest. I can't even imagine that and I'm quite willing to do whatever it takes to prevent it, but we don't know what's causing the high blood pressure. I had hoped it was the overuse of my asthma meds, but now that seems to be better controlled but the bp numbers aren't falling. Sigh.

My ob had mentioned referring me to a neurologist if the headaches persisted, so I don't know if that's still a possibility or not. I'm hoping for some easy fix-- a prescription that won't cause any side effects that will lower my blood pressure and let me avoid bed rest in the coming months. Maybe that's wishful thinking.

So, we'll see. Stressing over it isn't going to help my blood pressure, but I had hoped to avoid any bumps in the road with this pregnancy-- other than the one I'm carrying around, of course.

18 Week Bump (18w0d)

I don't think I've actually gotten bigger in a week.


.

T-Shirt Fun (17w5d)

Just some fun pregnancy T-shirts I've found. I don't have any... yet.

Because his father is and I imagine he might be, too:

Because it sounds better than what I really do some days, which is nap, try to work, eat and nap some more:

I'm not, but I love Rosie the Riveter and this shirt cracks me up:

Because I can't be held responsible for what I might do:

Flutters (17w4d)

I have been feeling flutters for a couple of weeks now. At first, I wasn't sure if I knew what I was feeling or if I was imagining it. The first time (and most times since then), I was laying on my stomach and felt these little tap-tap-taps where my belly was pressed to the mattress. I guess I was squishing baby. Hmm.

Since then, I've felt it almost every day. Usually when I'm in bed, either falling asleep or just waking up. When everything is quiet and still, it happens: tap-tap-tap.

It's a strange feeling, like nothing I've ever felt. Difficult to describe, even. I've heard it described as butterfly wings (poetic) and hunger pains (biological) and gas (just gross), but it's not like any of those. It feels like what it is-- something foreign and alien living inside me.

Sometimes that thought creeps me out a bit. I know I'm supposed to love every minute of pregnancy and declare it to be a miracle, but I don't always (or even usually) feel that way. It's hard to get used to this notion of hosting another living thing inside my body. These mild flutters are a bit disconcerting, I'm not sure how the full-on assault of kicks and punches will affect me. I suppose I'll get used to it and look forward to those moments (but not when I'm trying to sleep!), but for now, it's all a bit new and strange.

And as I write this, I feel it again: tap-tap-tap.

Hello, baby. Hope everything is okay in there.

Bump (17w1d)

My first pregnancy picture.